October 16, 2009 Diet Blog

Another busy day. My coworker and I were overwhelmed but I'm glad she was with me. It always gets crazy around the holiday season at our job. It never seemed to stop this year though. There is way too much sadness in the world. I hope to ease part of that when my book comes out. Wish me luck.
I ate well today. I had water melon for breakfast, grapes for snack, Smart Ones for lunch with carrot sticks, no 3pm snack because I knew that I was having real pizza for dinner with my Blairtown BFF before we went over to redo her karaoke video for the Oprah contest. I had two slices. I chose the smallest and we were on our way. I had two glasses of wine and a bottled water throughout the entire evening. I feel like I did alright. I was also very active throughout the night.
Karaoke Buddy's girlfriend is back from Florida. She is here indefinitely because she may need to return to her daughter. It was so good to see her. They seemed so happy. He was dressed better. She is a huge influence on that. She says that the house was a pig-sty when she returned. She scrubbed it from stem to stern and it took the entire first full day home. She's been here since Monday. She wanted to surprise me. She did. No one gave it away.
Blairstown BFF did her video but we still liked the ones I took better. The new ones that is. It was well lit this time. I helped her write the essay that has to go along with it this morning and she'll be sending it in to the Oprah contest today or tonight sometime. The dead line is tomorrow. I'm kind if excited for her. I directed, wrote and 'produced' for lack of different terminology. She sang and wore what I told her to. She did great. We were quite a team. If she wins it'll feel like its partially mine, although I will be a silent partner. I'm just so proud of her. For me that type of thing doesn't come naturally. I do it- they laugh and they love me but I'm totally acting. My power is in my pen...or my keyboard. I know it. For her its natural to be on stage I think. She just loves to sing in front of people. She's been doing it since she was a little girl. Wish her luck too.
I did have one hard moment. Remember XBFF? I mentioned them a few times. X was actually there when we arrived. We went early because of the video and actually beat karaoke buddy there. It was immediatly uncomfortable but I couldn't go, not this time. I shook it off. Luckily x sat across the room and didn't even try to venture over. I kept my back towards that side of the room. X waved at Blairstown and she waved back. They've only met a few times so it was odd that X did that. Blairstown let me know because she felt a sense of disloyalty at waving back but I shooed it away. X doesn't have that much clout in my life for it to matter.
I thought about it later and realized that the profound thought in the sentence I just wrote is the attitude I need to take more often. I wrote about this because that realization is a bombshell for me. Little things like that tend to frazzle me, or at least they did up until the realization occurred in my mind. I use food to comfort that emotion usually.
It's funny.... The outcome was that karaoke buddy and his girlfriend came in just minutes later. The surprise was awesome and I forgot that X was even there for awhile. X came over to say goodnight to karaoke buddy's girlfriend, who is not real impressed with them anyway but accepted the hug. X threatened to come back later. I battle plan strategised in my head to leave gracefully and how I would do it if that happened so as no one, including X would know why I was going. It didn't happen. Of course it didn't. I think that comment was for me. X obviously got that avoiding them is my goal. That's X's way though. X lies. Rather than request a talk or be kind or anything along those lines, X takes the low road. That's what X does.
If I were to place a bet and I wanted to win, I'd say that X more than likely knew when the conversation occurred that coming back was not part of the plan. It didn't matter either way though. I had a plan.
Little things need to be seen as exactly that. Little things to be dealt with quickly and then let slide off my shoulder. It's a break through for me. I feel good.
On that note I will sign off reminding us all that we look as good as we can for today. Tomorrow we will look that much better. Do not let your perception of your body stand in the way of you having a good time. Stay positive...and if an outside influence is negative, let it go. It's not worth your time! Have a great day! See you tomorrow! ;-)