February 11, 2011 Diet Blog

Okay- so I had the day off of work, and what a productive day it was! I did computer work for the Memphis Book event, writing letters to famous people like Ellen, Oprah/OWN and The View asking for coverage at the Event and explaining SIDS to them, I face booked of course, and blogged. I also went grocery shopping. This current diet has me literally going three times a week so that I can serve things fresh. It's hard, but it's keeping my brain active. Speaking of that, I wonder if that's something that I might need as well. Change in the Diet stimulated me brain-wise. Maybe boredom, even in this area is not something I'm good at. Hmmm...'food for thought' ...not the meaning I thought of originally LOL. BUT it has merit.
After grocery shopping I cleaned my bedroom then relaxed until my husband came home at which time I fixed dinner. Not a bad day I'd say....
Today's food consisted of coffee for breakfast, diet jello at 10 am because we needed more fruit at the grocery store, lunch was left over beef and broccoli, I added strawberries to make sure that I got the two fruits a day in. 3pm was strawberries again and they were luscious by the way, dinner was roast chicken, cucumber and carrot slices and diet jello for dessert. I really feel like I did well today.
If you are inclined toward prayer, could I trouble you to take a moment and pray for my Books to be a success, for the Memphis Book Event to be covered by the BIG names and the fame I need to see the dreams of helping SIDS come to fruition? I would really appreciate any help you could give in getting the message into the Lord's Divine hands. Thank you.
I know this blog is short but it's been a bust day. I hope that you are doing well. I'm feeling better and forging ahead! See you next blog! ;-)

February 10, 2011 Diet Blog

First let me begin by apologising for yesterdays post. I was so depressed and upset. I'm leaving it up though. I did not cheat and I was at the point where I normally would have. It's better that you see that part of me too. I promised honestly, and that's really what I give...even if there was a little too much of it yesterday lol.
I had chicken breast and carrots for lunch, of course the usual coffee for breakfast. The 10am snack, and 3pm snack were apples, and dinner was lean beef and broccoli. I drank all of my water and got through the day feeling much, much better. I feel better when I'm doing nice things for others so I did a bunch of anonymous random acts of kindness that varied from letting people into traffic to putting a few bucks into charities to entering a contest to win things for a friend in need... It made me feel so much better.
Work went smoothly, dinner went fine...I still feel the overwhelming sense of loneliness. I'm not sure why.
A funny thing happened though. As I've mentioned I'm trying to help my husband watch what he eats too for his health purposes. Today he comes home- complains about the beautiful salad I made him for dinner and tells me that he went into the Deli across the street from his job for lunch. Then he proceeds to tell me (get this) that he chose a balanced meal based upon the theory regarding the food pyramid.
This caught my interest. I was pleasantly surprised...almost...he then explained that the roast beef and provolone hero on the whole grain bread accompanied by an orange soda covered it all. Before I could reconnect my jaw he explained that Roast beef was lean meat, provolone was dairy, vegetables and oil were on it, the bread was thick but whole grain and orange soda was the fruit.
I had no words....
He then laughed out loud telling me that the look on my face was priceless and that he'd had a grilled chicken salad from the Deli.
Very funny, I said.
But I was relieved. At least he's trying. It probably took him all day to come up with that scenario knowing full well I'd be...well...let's just say stunned and leave it at that. I changed our salad to broccoli and he was happier. Gees. See you next blog.

February 9, 2011 Diet Blog

Hi! Just a quick check in to tell you what I ate. I had coffee for breakfast, apple at 10am, chicken breast and carrots at lunch, 3pm apple, baked chicken theigh and sliced cucumber for dinner.
I feel frustrated and angry right now. The nail place that is supposed to do the mani-pedi the day before the Memphis tour had to cancel the appointment I made 3 weeks in advance. She wants to reschedule to 9pm wednesday or Thursday night. If she BEGINS at 9- I'm there until 11-11:30 ish. I get up at 6:30 every day for work. That's ridiculous! Several other things happened too, but I'm so frustrated that I don't even want to write it right now.
The diet is going well, but the doormat reins supreme. I just want to cry. I'm not sure what to do.
I feel so...alone...
I hate this feeling...
forgive me for this blog- I'll try and pull myself together by tomorrow...
at least you know what foods I ate and that I'm still steadfast on the diet that has thusly made me spike three pounds...
sigh...
See you next blog.

February 8, 2011 Diet Blog

Well this was indeed the day of the dormat...Not at work. Work was fine. Then I came home to my husband having to rush out to a Dentist appointment that he forgot about. That was fine, but he didn't want dinner, which meant that he was going to grab junk food on the go because he was going right from there to college. While he was gone I thought that I'd have a nice hot, healthy meal waiting for him when he got home. I roasted chicked, prepared veggies and fruit...you know 2 hour meal...really thinking he would be so happy. I set the table with a candle and pretty glasses etc and just minutes before he was due in the phone rang. He was at a Mexican restaurant having dinner and wouldn't be home until late. I said nothing. It's not like he knew I was doing something nice for him...it's just...well 'par for the course' these days. We hung up, I cleaned up and went to bed.
This morning he noticed the prepared food in the refigerator. I wasn't mad but explained myself. He told me that he'd throw together a container and take it for lunch. Since there was plenty of time to do that I was happy. At least he's trying to be healthy. ALL of his blood work is WAY off. I'm trying to help with that... anyway, should I tell you? No, he didn't do that either. I'm a little myphed. Should I say anything? Will I? Probobly not because he'll dig his heels in and not try then...he can be a child that way. Sigh...best laid plans...on the brighter side AT LEAST he's eating healthy when he's with me, right? That's something.
Today I had coffee for breakfast, left over shish ka bob for lunch with carrots, chicken breast for dinner with cucumber slices and carrots and Diet jello.
I WAS totally stressed so I ate ALOT of Diet Jello. If the stress triggers the eating binge- I'm gonna try to use jello. It's sweet, tasty and filling and next to NO calories.
That's it for now. See you next blog. ;-)

February 7, 2011 Diet Blog

Whew, what a long day. I've been sleeping badly- that is to say, intermittently. I literally see the clock every hour all night long. I finally seem to nod off just as I have to wake up for work. I'm so tired.
It was a nice day. Busy, but not overwhelming. Thats the way I like the day to go. Plus I learned a new aspect of my departments jobs. That was cool. It took me a long time to get it down pat- but the good part is that no one pressures me in this department. I had as long as I needed to get the job done. I did get it done- and it came out perfect! My supervisor said so.
My co-worker from the front desk got promoted today. She'll be coming to the back in a week-ish. I'm so thrilled for her. I'm sad for the one moving into 'our' chair as my co-worker put it. THAT is a hard place to be everyday...talk about stress...no, on second thought let's not. I'm feeling kinda good... ;-)
On my way home from work I stopped at the grocery store to pick up several items that I had accidentally forgotten the other day. I was pleasantly surprised by a call from my friend in Florida. I can't help but wonder if he realizes what he almost lost in having me as a friend. I might not be the most beautiful girl asthetically speaking- but a better friend you'll not find... but anyway...
He is having a major disagreement with his sister. It's been going on for awhile now. He sounded so sad though. His health is doing better. He is on a microbiotic diet of some sort to clean the Hep-C out of his liver. He's quit smoking as of New Year, and has been sober and clean of alcohol and drugs for years now. He's still dealing with post-stroke issues that seriously mounted up, but he's okay. I'm proud of him. Changing yourself that drastically has to be rough. It has to be a concious effort 24/7. He's still the same guy that went down that path in the first place. You've got to give credit where it is due.
That same thing applies to us dieter die hards. Like him, we try and fail many times before the 'habit' of taking care of ourselves kicks in. We're still the same person, and fighting to change our way of handling a situation is a 24/7 job. Kudos to my friend...and you know what? Kudos to us too...let's get back on this horse and ride happily ever after into our respective horizons.
This morning I had the usual cup of coffee for breakfast, at 10am I had strawberries. For lunch I had 4 oz chicken breast and carrots. At 3pm I had an apple. For dinner I made organic shish ka bobs. Organic veggies and meats are supposed to be better for you. I did that, but honestly it's too expensive. I'll just use the regular things washed really well from here on in. I drank enough water to cause a flood....
The shish ka bobs were made with cubes of lean beef. Mine had 4 oz and my husbands had 6oz. They also had onions and yellow peppers between the cubes. This was laid over a bed of broccolli, cauliflower and carrots. My husband added a fruit cup to his meal because he hadn't had any fruit today. We had cherry diet jello for dessert. Really pleasing to the eye, and my tastebuds were cheering with glee!
I have to tell you that jello is excellent for the hair and nails. My nails have never been as strong, long or beautiful as they are now. My hair is VERY damaged since I got that bad perm. I'm hoping that it will help it to grow and to heal faster. The Memphis tour is so close. I'm so sad that I'm going to look like 'this' for it after all of my hard work to lose weight and feel better about myself. (sigh)
Anyway- so this diet isn't bad. No headache today- just exhaustion...and oddly enough, I'm not hungry. My sister in law told me that not being hungry was a side effect of this diet according to the Doctor. I didn't believe it for a second! It's true though. Maybe it's because of the fruit alone on an empty stomach thing...who knows? I just have to say that I like the feeling. I'm less likely to eat junk food if my tummy has no rumbly, if you know what I mean.
Enjoy your day, your week, ...your life. I've learned that it can be gone in a split second. Live in the moment- today. That's really all we have, isn't it? See you next blog. ;-)

February 6, 2011 Diet blog

Superbowl Sunday. We worked on the upstairs bathroom this morning. I did laundry, and worked on the computer completing tasks that have been piling up. I made my husband lunch and dinner, and then we went to my sister in laws to watch the big game.
I had coffee for breakfast. Strawberries at 10am. Lunch was the last of the beef tenderloin and carrots. 3pm turned into 3:30 and again, I had strawberries. Dinner was broiled scallops and broccoli for me. My husband added a yogurt and a mixed fruit cup, and of course 6oz of scallops to my 4 oz.
I didn't eat one drop of the food being served by my sister in law. It was all bad- but she cheats now and again now because she can. This diet lasts 40 days, then you go off for five weeks, maintaining within a 2 pound radius both up or down. This 'sets' the clock in your internal system. This hold the weight steady so your body gets used to it. After that you go back on for 40 days and repeat or until you reach your goal and want to maintain. It sounds easy enough. I'll keep you posted.
The book event is coming up and my hair is still horrible. My sister in law says that I should buy a wig because the only way to fix it is to cut it all off and start over. I know...it's bad. I cannot believe that I'm stuck looking like crap for the Memphis tour. I could cry.
My mother in law left the sink running and flooded the kitchen and the basement while we were watching the game. The water literally poured out of the ceiling. We had to use those great big Rubbermaid bins to catch the water. Needless to say, we missed the entire half time show and a good portion of the game cleaning up the huge mess. Both she and my husband swear that my mother in law does that stuff on purpose because she's not getting attention. If she is I'm sure that God will point that out to her, but personally at 83, I think she's about 25% with it if that much. She infuriates all of us though- since she was much younger- so they could be right.
It's been a long, but productive day. I'm very tired and heading to bed. Work comes early. I did wake up with another headache today. This time it was on the other side of my head though. My husband thought that it may be sinus so I took that kind of medicine. He could be right. One tablet did the trick and I'm still fine.
Enjoy your morning/noon/night. I hope your team won the game. See you next blog. ;-)

February 5, 2011 2nd Entry

The second half of the day went well. We went mattress shopping and then walked around the mall because I felt like we should get some kind of exercise in. My husband was willing. I put him on a modified version of the diet I am on, it's a cross between this one and the previous one. He is a lot larger than me- so 'one size cannot fit all' if you get my drift.
I had coffee for breakfast with a squirt of milk for color. I had an orange at 10am. Lunch was left over tenderloin and carrots, 3pm I was still out so I ate another orange at 5pm while I cooked dinner. Dinner was at 6:30pm and we had grilled chicken salad. Mine consisted of lettuce, cucumbers and strips of chicken breast-4oz worth. My husbands was 6 oz worth and I added tomatoes and cheese grated to give it flavor. He added dressing. I did not. He had grapes with his at my insistence as well. It filled him up and he didn't have cookies. I remain stricter than him, but his will work too. The other diet worked, don't misunderstand. I just plateaued. To quote my sister in law- I'm shaking things up to change it up! I like that statement.
While we were wandering through the mall I spotted a build a bear store. There were a hundred kids. I accidentally drifted off into the world where I write things in my head, and saw/wrote a commercial for them. I actually emailed the idea to the marketing director. I have no idea if they will use it or not, but I figured what the heck...maybe they'll like it.
It's 8:15 pm and I have to admit I'm feeling very tired. I had a migraine this morning. 6 extra strength Tylenol later it finally subsided. It takes the wind right out of my sails when that happens. A young man from India friended me on facebook. What a polite young man. He calls me sister. So sweet. That was really the two highlights of my day. Except that my husband did tell me that the chicken was done perfectly- that was nice. ...And surprising....
I'll sign off now- for dessert I made Diet jello. I'm not having any, but he needs his sweet snack before he goes to bed. Yes- he IS spoiled before you ask. See you next blog. ;-)

February 5, 2011 Diet Blog 1st entry

Well according to the scale I'm up 3 pounds...somehow, this is NOT what I had in mind. Still, it could be 'off' for several reasons: I wore my nightgown, I had to go to the bathroom, and I'm nauseous with a migraine headache. So I'm going to continue just to see if its a farce or not.
I already know that there will be two entries today because of this horrible turn of events. The weight gain left me upset- I told you that the number on the scale throws me. But really, I did badly for a long time and nothing happened, so I guess I should be grateful. Another thing that threw me was looking up that HCG stuff. It's a pregnancy hormone found in the urine of pregnant females...google HCG diet supplement- there are several sites that I found interesting. I'm not paying $600 for THAT I'll clue you...
The diet itself is hard. There is no flour, no sugar, nothing MAN MADE and no dairy. (I do put a bit of milk in my coffee as I cannot drink it black- I just can't.) I also let myself have Chrystal lite- but I haven't had any diet coke or veered from the diet at all. This will be day 3. 37 more to go.
Though my weight spiked three pounds I'm thinking that at least I shook something up. We'll see though, it's not over 'til the 'fat lady' sings right? I think I qualify and I'm certainly NOT in a singing mood.
Also, I tried to blow dry out some of the awful perm that I told you about. It's been about 8 weeks, the roots are gray again, so I figured I'd see if I can make it look a bit more presentable. I'm on television and the Memphis Book Event begins in two weeks. I cannot believe the hair is still this bad. I went through the entire Christmas Holiday this way, and the trip to Florida. I'm feeling like a total ugly ducking here... Anyway, it doesn't look much better. It's Very fuzzy.
It's thehalf way point of the day so I'll sign off here and post the food for the day in the second entry. Have a good rest of the morning/afternoon or night. See you later! ;-)

February 4, 2011 Diet Blog

It was wear red day today at work. It was to promote awareness about heart health. It's a good thing to be aware of in my opinion and so I wore red. Someone actually said 'hi skinny' to me. I had to laugh at that one. Funny that it's day 2 of that diet that my sister in law is referring me to. I do have to make a point though, about this diet.
She contacted me today and said that she was wondering if I would mind taking HCG that her doctor has her on along with the diet. I'm not sure what it is, but it comes in drops to be put into her water. I have an adversity to putting anything into my system like that because I believe that dieting is a forever thing for people that have my metabolism or my predisposed condition towards being overweight. I mentioned my reservations to her. She said that she only had to take this HCG stuff for the forty days. I considered it for a split second. When she told me that it was ONLY $600 I nearly fainted. The word ONLY in the same sentence as $600 is a quicker deterrent for me than the original reasons that I stated here. Needless to say- I will not be taking HCG. I will be taking my vitamins and the prescription ordered by my doctor that has nothing to do with my weight.
That being said- I'm here to tell you that I toughed it out with this diet today. For breakfast I had coffee. (I accidentally left the pot on and came home to a charcoal pot- but that's another story titled the pot really is black whether the kettle is or not...) At 10am I had an apple. At noon I had left over beef tenderloin from last nights dinner- 4 oz and vegetable medley- 2 cups. At 3pm I had another apple. Dinner was 4oz salmon cucumbers 1 cup, carrots-1 cup. I drank all of the water and suffered through the diet headache that usually hits on day 3 of a diet for me.
The added bonus of the day was the 'Superbowl' party at work, which just means people bring in tons of fattening foods and we eat 'til we pop. I didn't have so much as one chip. My co-workers all think I'm such a disciplined person. It's funny. They should see me when the 'addict' shows up during tremendously stressful situations. They'd have to figure out a different word because 'disciplined' would surely be less than a perfect fit.
I have a sad heart today for someone I love very much who has just discovered that her husband of nearly two decades is cheating on her. She phoned me hysterically crying. This person is one of the strongest people I've ever met. Hearing her today- reduced to tears and sobs was almost more than I could bare. My friend from Florida that I recently visited called me too. The bad day seemed to have been contagious at that point. I let him vent- finding myself weary of having an opinion. But then he gave me a turn and I told him about the other person and how helpless that I feel. Surprisingly, he gave some interesting advice. Clearly I can't step in the way of the pain, but I should be there to 'hold' her through it....like I did for him even though we were a half of a world apart. I have to tell you- that was probably the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me without actually paying me a direct compliment. I'm still reeling from it and the ice I've built up around my heart where he was concerned turned to slush. Messy, cold and still chock full of icy lumps, but melting just the same- Do you understand what I mean?
Those two phone calls were right after work. Then I cooked the dinner- NOT to my husbands satisfaction. I broiled the Salmon. It was too crispy on the top. I added sliced orange pieces to his meal to be sure that he got fruit into himself- the oranges were 'weird.' We had cucumbers instead of the originally planned green beans because I couldn't find them. Either I forgot to buy them or I left them in the store...perhaps they are in the 'land of the one socks' that disappear through the dryer vent from time to time.... either way, no green beans. Finally, I told him to cook his own dinner from now on. He shut up. It was a good thing....my mood was kind of crashing.
BUT I didn't cheat. I was well tested, and well resilient, thankfully. Sigh though... you know what I mean?
I'll sign off here. Enjoy your morning/afternoon/evening. See you next blog. ;-)

February 3 2011 Diet Blog

Okay. I promised you the truth no matter what- so here goes...I CANNOT pull it together. I made it to ten days and then we had a huge ice storm on top of the multiple snow storms we've had this year. We got dismissed early from work- a blessing because of the treacherous tundra we had to drive in and I headed out. There is a hill that I must go up to get home. For those of you who are thinking- Gees take a different route- I say Great idea. I don't know one. Directions are at the very low end of my talents and the GPS takes me this way. So, anyway at the halfway point of the hill there sits a traffic light. I gingerly stop at it praying the car won't slide. There is no one behind me, no one in front of me and no one on the other side. I'm thinking that's good luck.
With that, this HUGE maroon-ish red dump truck slides around the corner but doesn't straighten out and comes down the hill sideways. The door read "Breen" and I remember thinking that the truck had my mother's last name on it. The letters were yellow. The driver of the truck was frantically doing whatever he could to stop the truck, but to no avail. He had a look of sheer horror on his face...I imagine I wore one much the same.
I closed my eyes and braced for impact. To be honest- I thought that was it. My life was over. Death was upon me. That truck would've squashed me like a bug. A bright yellow light filled my eyelids and I thought "Oh my God," but not in a panicked way. I just thought it. And then I waited.
It seemed like way too long for me not to be dead, and I wondered if I was. I opened my eyes feeling no pain what so ever and wondering if Jesus or the Angels would be there. They weren't. I was at the light. The back of the truck continued on in the opposite way than it had originally wanted to go. I took a deep breath in and continued home. I shook the entire way. My mind was completely blank. I'm not sure how I got there.
The next morning was delayed opening at work. My car looked as if an inch thick blanket of ice was layed over it. The driving was worse. I panicked. I shook. I only went in because the Memphis Book event is in two weeks and I need any days for that type of thing. Once there, everyone had some kind of issue. One girl fell twice, the new mother fell in the parking lot, who had nearly been hit by another vehicle, and me.... my near death experience.
The adoption clerk put out a crumb cake fresh from the bakery. The 3rd in command put out chocolates. You can guess the rest. I figured, if I'm dead- none of this would matter. I had a skewed view of things, I think from fright. Anyway- I did everything BAD that I could without caring and in full knowledge.
Needless to say, I know that I need to get back on track, because in fact I am clearly NOT dead and it does matter for several reasons. One of them being health, another being self esteem, but then I got to thinking...the poor souls that have to carry my coffin...Pall bearers or whatever they are called...Oh Crap! I need to lose weight.
While talking to my sister-in-law who became my instant diet guru having lost 30 pounds under a doctors care and is looking wonderful, she thought that there was a chance that I might be bored. Maybe I need to change up- to shake up my system. I have been riding this same weight within a five pound radius for quite some time. It sounded like a plan, so she gave me all of the diet hints and I began yesterday, successfully. It is different than my norm so I will tell you what I eat again.
They only want you to have coffee or tea for breakfast. They want you to have it black. She puts a bit of milk in hers because black is disgusting. I agree, but no sugar obviously. (For me, I thought that breakfast was important. The doc says that a big breakfast makes you hungry all day. Okay I'll try.)
At 10am I had an apple. Fruit is taken on an empty stomach and by itself. The doc says it helps your body to burn hyper stored fat quicker. Okay.
Lunch is 100 grams or 4 oz of lean meat- beef-chicken- fish-shrimp, you know the drill. (That's an ounce more for me.) And 2 cups of veggies. I had roast beef and carrots. I had lunch at noon, as that is my assigned time at work.
Dinner was 4 oz tenderloin and 2 cups vegetable medley which consisted of Broccoli, cauliflower and carrots cooked. You can spice as needed which was good, no dressings of any kind.
64 oz of water is the required amount.
NOTHING MAN MADE- everything fresh, not canned or frozen.
This diet lasts for 40 days, then it changes. As I get there I'll tell you how it changes. Right now she didn't know.
No bread, pasta, anything with white flour or sugar.
It's different than the one I've been following, but if you want to try it with me, jump on board! I'm going to give it a try. I need to move past this spot... you know, for the poor people that have to carry me 300 years from now! ;-)
I'll sign off here. Work time approaches! Enjoy your day. See you next blog! ;-)